Today is my baby girl’s 11th birthday! Time sure flies like mad!!! The day I lay on my gynae’s procedures room to have an amnio procedure carried out when Cass was around 20+ weeks in utero till today seems like just last year though we had gone through hell and beyond in the first 13 months of her life and lots of roller coaster rides the past 11 years.
I often wish that Cass was still a toddler. We all enjoyed Cass thoroughly from the time after her surgeries when she was 14 months old right until she went to primary school. She was the sweetest, most accommodating, cutest little girl that could melt any heart, especially mine, in an instance.
Fast forward to the year she turned 9. With all the raging hormones swimming inside of her, the little angel who would tug at my heartstrings changed into a very challenging tween. Everyday is a battle with her. Every. single. day. On some good days, we could both go to bed without any fight. She would sit by my bedside and give me massages on my hands and legs with her soft gentle hands. We would talk and joke like best friends. We would trade secrets, she would console me, and me console her. But the next day, the battle starts again and from friends, we turn into enemies. We’re just “frenemies”. We both know it.
At the moment I am still battling some issues with Cass. The issues may seem big, yet small, depending on how other people view them. For some carefree parents, these are not major issues. But I’m a helicopter mom and to me, these issues, if not rectified, would balloon up in time to come into something so big and serious that it would be hard to fix. My hubs, the carefree, slap-happy dad and man that he is has always asked me to relax and don’t force the kids to do anything that they don’t like, though what I am forcing them is good for them. We both have different parenting ways.
I shall not dwell into the battles that Cass and I are facing now here. Besides these battles, this year is the year that I will have to bring Cass back to see the nephrologists at HKL. It’s time that the doctors review her medical condition and perhaps do some invasive diagnostic tests. Again, I have to let go on this. I shall talk about this in detail next time. Today’s post is on my baby girl’s birthday!
After a very serious and heated argument between the both of us late last week, I’ve realized something:
1. Every child is different. Cass is different from her sisters and she’s different from her other classmates whom I sometimes wish she could emulate. And it is almost impossible for me to mould her into the person whom I wish her to be.
2. Some children are easier to ‘shape’ while others are harder. Cass happens to fall in the latter group.
3. I have to let go on expectations. If I don’t, both Cass and I will be unhappy. And this will affect Cass and I emotionally, deeply. Our relationship will turn from sour to rotten. And this is already starting to happen. I realized since that fateful night that I have to change / let go so that Cass can change too. What’s important now is for Cass to be happy, to grow up happy and be a mentally and physically healthy child.
Anyway, back to Cass’ birthday today!
Right now, I am contemplating whether to cook spaghetti bolognese (Cass’ favorite dish) or order KFC (another of her favorite unhealthy fast food). This morning, I was given 16 articles to write by my ‘online boss’ and the deadline reads “ASAP”. On one hand, I want only the healthiest and most wholesome meal to go into the stomachs of my babies but on the other hand, I do not have the time to go shopping for the ingredients to cook spaghetti bolognese tonight.
After discussing with the cook of the house, we both unanimously agreed to choose KFC 😅 as KFC is more a kids’ party food.
And after tonight, no more KFC for the next one year. It’s detox time! Just kidding. Probably no KFC for the next 3 months or longer.
Sorry, no pix for today. I’ve to go back to my writing now or I’ll surely stoke the wrath of my online boss. I promised to submit 7 or 8 articles by today and the remaining by tomorrow. And I am only stuck at article #2 now!! 😱
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